Fool me once, shame on you…

Most of the time, I really do give a person or restaurant or company or some other entity a maximum of two chances to jerk me around and disappoint me before I cut my losses and walk away.

 For some reason unbeknownst to me, I am incapable of doing this with Subway and their Muffin Melt.

I have the absolute worst luck trying to get one of those delicious breakfast sandwiches. It doesn’t matter which Subway I go to; there will be problems and I will either storm out without a sandwich or with a subpar sandwich that I probably shouldn’t have paid for.

 Honestly these are some of the experiences I’ve had:

-The visit where the lady was new and couldn’t find the egg whites (Don’t they train their employees?)

-The visit where they had run out of egg whites (it’s called assessing your stock, people)

-The visit where I waited patiently up front for 10 minutes and never had anyone deign to make an appearance from the back of the store (God only knows what they were doing back there…)

-The multiple visits (or attempted visits) where they simply weren’t open (despite the fact that every other Subway on earth apparently opens at 7:00 but this one)

And yet I keep going back. Call me a sucker, but I love those damn sandwiches.

This morning, I had a coupon for a $1 Muffin Melt. Well that meant I had to go, of course. And there’s a Subway/gas station combo right near daycare – almost like it was put that way by fate since I needed to fill up my car too!

 I should have known I was in for disappointment when I walked in and the pimply faced teenager behind the counter greeted me with a complete lack of enthusiasm. It technically couldn’t even be called a greeting. I think the appropriate term would be “a grunt of acknowledgement.”

Still I held out hope…

 Until we got to the part where he was putting toppings on the sammy.

I asked for spinach. He tried to give me lettuce. Then, after I said, “No. Spinach please” I got two measly pieces of baby spinach. When he glanced down at how pathetic that look, he did manage to scrape up another spinach leaf, to bring the grand total to three.

 I then got the most anemic looking, tiny slice of tomato I’ve ever seen.

And then we got to the banana peppers – my favorite part of the breakfast sammy. I got two and a half peppers. And they weren’t even two and a half of the big slices from the middle of the pepper. Noooo. These were two and half pieces of the miserable little slices from the not-nearly-as-tasty butt of the pepper.

Pimple face then proceeded to slap the two halves of my sandwich together, thrust it into a bag (with one napkin, no more), and shove it across the counter at me. All without actually managing more than the occasional grunt.

Granted, I only paid a dollar for the damn thing – but I’m pretty sure that was more than it was worth.

 Subway, I think I am officially breaking up with you…

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