The Ranch Incident

Me: Can you get me the ranch?
DB: I don’t see it. Where is it?
Me: it’s either on the door of the fridge or one of the shelves.
DB: I can’t see it.
Me: Do you have your Daddy eyes on? Because I can come help you look if you need it. (Said with maximum sarcasm and contempt…)
DB: No, I’m telling you it’s not here!
Me: It’s a white bottle with green and blue on it. How can you miss it?!?!
DB: You mean, like that bottle next to you on the sofa?
Me: ….

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